Let's Talk About Forgiveness

 

Let's Talk About Forgiveness (or the Refusal Thereof)

People love to say forgiveness is the path to peace.

But forgiveness, as it’s commonly preached, is hollow.

Moving past what hurt you matters.

Releasing the victim identity matters.

But forgiveness does not mean absolution—and it does not require acceptance.

To me, forgiveness has been twisted into something dangerous.

It’s been rebranded as virtue when it often asks survivors to minimize the trauma inflicted on their souls—trauma that was unwarranted, undeserved, and not of their making.

So no.

I don’t forgive.

Acceptance does not mean accepting the pain someone chose to inflict.

It does not mean making peace with emotional hell.

And it sure as hell doesn’t mean excusing cruelty because someone else is broken.

Here’s the truth most people avoid:

Broken people hurt others not by accident—but by projection.

They try to pull you down to the level of pain they live in because they cannot rise above it themselves.

And for that?

I feel pity.

I feel sorrow.

I feel distance.

But I do not forgive.

Forgiveness is an overused story told by people who haven’t yet reckoned with reality.

There are people in this world damaged by terrible things—and that does not grant them the right to harm you.

Ever.

Forgiveness is for children who say I’m sorry.

Your perpetrators were never sorry.

And given the chance, many would do it again.

So no—don’t forgive them.

Don’t forget either.

Instead:

Move beyond.

Rise above.

Find peace in the truth that it wasn’t you.

You didn’t cause it.

You weren’t the reason.

You didn’t deserve it.

Pity them if you must.

But never confuse peace with permission.

Remember. Rise. Untether.

— Untethered Warrior